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Showing posts with label Life Stories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life Stories. Show all posts

Friday, May 5, 2023

Split and Divide

Life is not some kind of a straight line that is easy to get pass through it and live on
If you had that kind of life, enjoy it
Be grateful for that
Not all of the people in this world can have it that way

Some don’t have faith to live that way; they’re dead
Some don’t have strength to live that way; they’re hiding for the rest of their life
Some don’t have chance to live that way; they’re living in sorrow
Some don’t have knowledge to live that way; they’re left behind
Some don’t have friends to live with; they’re lonely
And some other who I didn’t mention; they have to face their own matter

I’m the one in the hiding situation
I don’t know when and how will I end this hiding and live free

Sunday, March 4, 2018

The Beautiful of Life

When you have time to live
what would you like you have?

When I was thinking about
my life that has passing
the eyes, I have seen
the love I have received
all its beautifulness
I've missed it all

I had a dream
that I'll be happily
live with someone
that I will love him
so much

It'll be a good day
when we go somewhere
where the greeneries
spread all over the path
we through together
smiling and holding

I would like to have it

If I can be with him
in a beautiful countryside
sky is covering us
clouds are cheering us
birds are chirping
singing their special song
the wind swirls caress
my cheek
my hairs
the best time
in my life

I wish I will have that all
soon..
Not making a bad decision
to spend the rest
of my life...


// words of Gizela
// inspired by Nick Drake's "Which Will"
// thru How I Live Now [2013]

Thursday, October 5, 2017

Poignant

When you have poignant
You have to try
To dismiss it
Don't let your mind
Being controlled
By your pain
I know
Life is so hard
There are so many
Bads that ripped
Your soul so deep
But you have
To be strong
To face it all
Eventhough
It is terribly hard

I have tasted
The bitter
Of being a human
Of being disappointed
Of being embarrassed
Of being sad
Of being someone
Who were ignored
By others
In my youth
But I tried
To stop it
And not letting
Them all
Scrape me
Inside and outside
So I can win
And be myself

Saturday, September 30, 2017

...

Right now my minds is not healthy. I am in a very deep situation which makes my heart wants to brake into pieces. I actually can not hold it and wants to explode and shouts all my anger to open space.
I am in the situation where I see my mother everyday in depressed because of my father never wants to understand my mother.
He is now I see becomes the most disappointing person in my life. I can never understand why he did it all to my mother.
He becomes the most annoying person I see in my life. I could never accept that and never happy about it. But I can not revolt him because he is my father and I do not have rights to do that because I am afraid of God.
I wanted to do something to help my mother but I can not because I do not have the budget.
I am so so very sad and wanted to cry but I can not because I am myself have got depressed as my mother. I am feeling the depression because seeing my mother got her depression. I am so sad, so so very sad.

I am.. *sigh*
I..

This sadness
I could not tell this sadness
I have no responsible
For telling it
To anyone I knew
It is too embarrassing
For my father
I should not do that
For him
I do not want
To make him
Feel embarrassed
In front of public

I wish I have
A personal psychiatrist
For me
Or for my mother
Even more for my father
*sigh*
But I can not
I do not have budget
And my father is
Too taking counts on every single thing
*cries*

Friday, July 28, 2017

Fleeting

I always have this feeling
Once twice keep showing
Like I'm back to that thing
The time when everything
That happened and cling

The pictures just like real
When it makes me feel
Like I'm in a virtual dream
But my thoughts seem
They bring me back there
Sat and state somewhere

[written by Gizela]

Friday, July 21, 2017

I Mad

I feel guilty if I screw him
But I feel mad if I don't
I don't know what to do

Sometimes I feel depressed
Seeing someone I love
Got screw with him

Just want to kick him
out of my life
forever
But I'm not supposed to do that

Sometimes I ask myself
Did she make mistake?
But I don't think she was

She's actually a good person
But he never want to understand her

I got mad at him again
I wish I never met him again
I tried so hard not to think about that
But if he does
What can prevent me?

My heart beats
My head pains
All I want to do is despise him
Once and for all

Oh, I wish he's not coming close
For the rest of my life
He could affect so bad to me
To my life
To my future

Just stop this!
I hate you!

[words by Gizela]

Saturday, March 15, 2014

I am posting again

I know it's been a very long time I haven't post anything catchy except my last picture of idle planking job. I've been through a busy year in 2012 to 2013. I've been working in afternoon to night shift for 10 months and it really affect on my body weight.
Well, for 10 months of working time 3:00 p.m. to 10:00 p.m. my body lost about three or four kilograms. I guess that's because I've been really tired. And now, I'm keeping it in shape with some light exercise like cycling, lifting dumbbell, sit-ups and push-ups, and running in place.
I add eating less carbohydrates by choosing wheat, potatoes, and corn. I'm still eating rice but in less portion. I really change my habit because I want my body healthier inside and outside.
I feel really grateful that since I was kid my parents didn't accustom me by eating high fat and high calories food. So, I am used to it. Now, I just need to keep my eating habit and even make it better.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

My Unforgettable English Moment

I was walking down the supermarket row that day with my mom looking for something. Then a middle age foreign lady came to me asked me for something she didn't know where it was. I was in elementary school that time and hadn't have a good experience in using English for speaking but I was quiet confident that day to spoke with the lady.


When I was looking for my needs too she walked passing the row where I was and talked to me. I still remember she spoke to me in English and fortunately I understood what she meant. She was looking for something but she didn't know which row did the stuff was. But I already forgot what was she looking for because it happened long time ago and I can't remember anymore.


She came to me with a little smile spread on her face, "Hello, can you tell me where the .... was?"
Then I said, "You can go there and then turn .... go to the .... row so you can find it."
She nodded and smile to me means she understood and say thank you to me.


After she gone, I came to my mom and said that I was meeting a foreign lady asking for something and I could show her the way and she understood.
I was very happy at that time and proud to myself because though in my very young age without any experience to talked with any foreigner, I could done that successfully.
That was one of my very impressive "English moment" in my life as a kid. I could never forget that.


[words by Gizela]

Monday, September 5, 2011

Suddenly I Got This

5 September 2011,
Night before I sleep...


I'm writing to myself
It's been one year and five months
And it's six months to go
I'm still in my own world
Without no one except my parent
To live with
And enjoy the life
I'm still not doing anything
Except flying on my own dreams
Still never want to leave it
But still in my parent's loves
And cares
And guidance
And live happily everyday
And my God still loves me
With full of joy
Where I'm a bit selfish, sometimes...
I must aware,
I know!
I still need those all
'Cause I'm nothing without them
It's always better to live with all those warns
In case I'm alive.


I just want to tell the world
That we're all had to always grateful
For everything we got


Here I am
Still in the middle of life's trap
I'm still jobless
I wish I could get one
And make my parent proud
'Cause I'm their only hope
I'm the only one they had
I wish I could still grateful
For everything I've got
Even I'm in deep minds confusing


Bless me God
Bless my parent
Bless everyone
Bless this world
'Till we back to You
Amen.


With Love,
R.G.L.


Ps: It's not a death letter, it's just all the whimpering wildest minds of me that has been disturbing for this time.


[words originally by Gizela with full of appreciation in life fulfillments]

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Harry Potter Phenomenon In My Life


If you want to know someone who has been a fan of Harry Potter; you can find the person who writes this story. Yes, it’s me!

Hi!
As you already know me, I can say that I’m a huge fan of this serial, franchise, and everything you knew about Harry Potter.

Harry Potter has become the part of my life for about 10 years of my young age. It started in 2001 when I’m still 14 at that time. This came to my days since the movie broke a fantastic phenomenon in the world. As I knew in my country, this still yet become an exploding moment of it.

I remember at the first time I read an article in one of the most popular newspaper in my country, Jawa Pos. I read about a recent movie that has become a famous out there in many other countries in this world. This movie story told about a kid that suddenly knew that actually and along this time he is a wizard but yet nobody tells him. I read about how this movie and also the books became the most popular at that time. Especially in England where it came from and in U.S.A. Absolutely, this has become a popular thing there. Until then it said that this movie also played in my country. And immediately I checked the movies schedule in that same newspaper.

Since that time, I always curious about anything related to Harry Potter stuffs.

Year after year I passed, my life become the part of world’s history. Harry Potter and its massive phenomenon has become the part in my life for these 10 years. I always followed any news about the books, films, and the actors. I also collect that news from Jawa Pos newspapers every time it’s been reported and made it into clippings in one paper holder. You can see it if you want but it’s only for personal collections of me alongside to my others belongings of Harry Potter stuffs.

I also collected the movie magazines. Two of my favorites are Cinemags and Movie Monthly. I use to collect that until the last movies finish to be presented in cinemas. Not just the magazines, it also had lots of gifts from the magazines such as official posters, scarfs, postcards, stickers, bookmarks, pendants, and of course the wands.

Beside the magazines and some of that stuffs, I of course have all of the books and DVDs. I got it all completed for 7 books of the adventures, 7 other books for supplements and 8 DVDs of the films. It’s been many years I spent lots of money to get those things completely for my personal collections.

Besides everything I mention up there, I also and always remember anything that happened in my life inside Harry Potter phenomenon. I have passed it all since I was 14 until right now I’m 24. I will never forget and I think this still become my favorite serials from all the time I’m alive.

If I read about the life of the actors who played the characters, they are so lucky and I can feel the feeling of being a family in their life too. I knew it and I can feel it. It’s been like what I feel too in this 10 years of Harry Potter times. I’m as a huge fan always curious about how the story will be portrayed in a movie but in this fully 10 years of it comes to farewell I feel not ready to say goodbye forever. I feel like there’s something that will go forever and I will lose it as it never comes back again. I don’t know what to say…

My life in Harry Potter times has got lots of influences especially in loves and friendships. I can see how did those two important things has spread out surrounding Harry’s life, although actually he’s lonely but he has a lot of friends and second families that loves him so much and made him strong to face the world.

Bravo Joanne Kathleen Rowling! You are the most inspiring writer in my life and your Harry Potter has amused me, I will never forget anything that happened in my life as you made massive phenomenon where I live inside it. Farewell Harry Potter…

Books:
Harry Potter and The Sorcerer’s Stone
Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets
Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban
Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire
Harry Potter and The Order of The Phoenix
Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince
Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows

Other books:
Tales of Beedle The Bard
Quidditch Through The Ages
Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them
The Magical Worlds of Harry Potter
An Interview with J.K. Rowling
Daniel Radcliffe: No Ordinary Wizard
Kisah Sukses J.K. Rowling di Balik Penulisan Harry Potter

DVDs:
Harry Potter and The Sorcerer’s Stone
Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets
Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban
Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire
Harry Potter and The Order of The Phoenix
Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince
Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows (Part 1)
Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows (Part 2)

[words by Gizela, mention stuffs  properties of Gizela]

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

The English Grammar Book Memories

It's Thursday August 5th 2010, 2.30 p.m. I've just holding a book--the English Grammar book that reminds me to someone who ever taught me English and had this book too. He is Mr. Wasito, a docent who ever taught me English but his already gone now.

I remember it was in Junior High--I has an extracurricular studies of three primary subjects which are Physics, Mathematics and English.

Mr. Wasito was a very kind teacher who patients and always encourage his students. He was one of the people who always encourage me to always improve my English. He knew and said that I have a talent of English language. He said that to my parent too. I remember it was seven until nine years ago.

But now, he is not here anymore..
He has died few years ago...but I still remember him until today..
Oh...it's too sad to remember..
I was shedding my tears while writing this memory.
............

Thank you Mr. Wasito. You were one of the people who has influenced me becoming a person who understand English and made me good on writing this all although I haven't become an expert.


Friday, October 1, 2010

My First English Moment

Do you remember when was the first time you learn English? As I remember I was learning it first time at fourth grade of elementary school. From the first time I met English I just straightly fell in love with this language. I know this language is cool and fun!

At that time, my teacher, Mr. Yohanes taught me and my friends English through school book. We've been taught about vocabularies at first. There's a lot of vocabularies that I still remember until right now. I got fruits and vegetables, vehicles for transportations, animals, colors, households, days and months, weathers, cloths, etc. My teacher also taught me about how to introduce myself and someone to others.

Fortunately for many tests my English always got good mark and I know that's because I like it so much and easy for me to learn.


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